QuantumLove (Lynne McTaggart) presents several guidelines to help a group of clouns create a dialog as opposed to a debate.
Build trust by sharing goals and reasons for participating.
Frame the dialog as a series of questions, not topics to be debated or discussed. Plan questions in advance.
Start with a single question and give everyone a chance to respond.
Go deep, but don’t debate. The purpose is not to reach a decision, but to explore and share deeply.
Don’t monologue.Each clown should have an upper limit of time to share.
Be alert to your own emotional reactions, particularly to those whose views differ from yours.
Engage in deep truth telling about what really matters to you in your community or your country.
Be fully present. Listen with heart and mind.
Don’t be judgmental, no matter how different some other clown’s worldview or actions are different from yours.
Root out misperceptions and stereotypes in your views of others during the process.
Avoid generalities (“always”, “never”,, and speak to the facts.
Make it personal. Tell stories from your own past, which places your interests and points of view in context. Speak in first person, rather than about a particlar point of view. Describe turning points in your life, your heroes, role models, parents, or parent figures, and your dreams.
Ask open questions unrelated to the area of conflict in order to get to get to know the clown whose views are different from yours.
Reflect back what you think the other clown had said.
Frame questions about a contentious issue in neutral language, without implied judgments.
Look for common interests, emotions, values, or experiences that emerge in the conversation. Ask the facilitator to point them out.